Thoughts on phones

I was around 13 and Mum had become seriously poorly and I needed to call an ambulance. We didn't have a phone so I ran round the corner to my Gran's house and got Auntie to make the call. What a  life saver communication can be. Just being able to pick up the phone to get help that night meant my Mum got the emergency operation she needed.

Then last night watching the live pictures on the TV of my hometown, Manchester, being ransacked was sickening and  frightening. Gemma was unsettled and wanted to know if Auntie was ok, so I was able to pick up the phone to check on her. What a sense of peace it gives you when you can talk to someone you love and are worried about and find out they're ok.

However 24 hours earlier I'd been blissfully unaware of the riots in London as we hadn't watched any news!!  How can that happen? All of a sudden your life is changed and your focus is changed from your own circumstances to those suffering such violence and lack of regard for human life and livelihoods.

There will be many discussions I'm sure about who's to blame and what the root cause of it all is, but what I've been thinking about is how it all escalated so quickly. One of the main causes seems to have been the use of BBM (instant messaging through Blackberry's). This seems to have been used to insight violence rather than help anyone, surely this 'tool' should be used more responsibly??

After all the mobile phone and the internet are only 'tools', as I was reminded yesterday when I had a coffee with a good friend of mine who had her phone stolen. It's a tool, and one we need to be the master of and not let it master us. I used to 'people watch' a lot, and really enjoy seeing how mother's reacted to their children, watching people in conversation, noticing an older person struggling with their shopping and then being able to help out. Now what do I do with that spare time, play with my phone, text, check out facebook, look something up on the internet, play a game!!! Surely we need to be more aware of our interactions with actual people rather than virtual friendships and self centred actions. Surely we need to be mastering the phone and other social networks and not letting them take complete control of our lives??

Connectedness

Over the weekend I had the privilege of playing a gig with 'The Sound Professors' (the worship band I play in). It was at a chilled festival which gave many people the opportunity to perform who may not necessarily be given a platform, and it gave us the opportunity to play some cool secular music which we don't often get the chance to do. After only a few rehearsals it was great to jam along with such talented musicians and pull a set list together. Rosie did an amazing job organizing us all and leading the band. Rehearsing and performing in such a way, draws you together like no other medium can. Music is a great unifier, and has a universal language all of its own, and playing in the band personally gives me a real sense of connectedness and purpose. Can't wait for the next one!!

I'm currently reading two Christian books which although seem quite different, are actually sharing some similarities in their content and both discuss this topic of connectedness.
The first book is 'The Church of Facebook' by Jesse Rice.The synopsis says this about the book:

This timely release explores the community-altering phenomenon of social networking sites and what it reveals about friendship, God and our own hearts. With hundreds of millions of users, social networks are changing how we form relationships, perceive others, and shape our identity. Yet at it s core, this movement reflects our need for community. Our longing for intimacy, connection and a place to belong has never been a secret, but social networking offers us a new perspective on the way we engage our community. How do these networks impact our relationships? In what ways are they shaping the way we think of ourselves? And how might this phenomenon subtly reflect a God who longs to connect with each one of us? The Church of Facebook explores these ideas and much more, offering a revealing look at the wildly popular world of online social networking.

My relationship with facebook has been a bit of a roller coaster to be honest and I'm seeing both good sides and bad sides to it. I think it's redefining friendships and creating more superficial relationships than anything has ever done before. On the other hand it is a useful tool for sharing news, staying in touch with friends who have moved away, and reconnecting with old friends. Did you know it's only been around for five years??? What did we do before facebook? How did we communicate with our friends and stay connected to them?

I'm not very far into the book (being a slow reader!!) but already it's helping me to understand some of how social networking has changed the way we do life and stay connected with one another.

The Second book I'm reading is 'Identity' by Charlotte Gambil from Abundant Life Church in Bradford.
I read this book some time ago, but this re read is giving me new insight into my relationships, my connectedness and my own security and self worth. Along with connectedness, it talks about separation, and how sometimes we have to move away from things that aren't leading us on the path God wants us to be on. Charlotte quotes Amos 3:3 'Do two people walk hand in hand if they aren't going to the same place?' and she goes on to say 'Think about who you are holding hands with because they will affect where you end up.'
In reading these books I'm being challenged about my relationships, about who I'm connected to, and why. They are helping me to value the people I have in my life in a different way and recognise that I have my own unique path which God has planned for me. As I was reading about this connectedness, I remembered the story of 'the vine and the branches' in John's gospel chapter 15.  This passage talks about God being our gardener and how a branch cannot bear fruit on it's own. It goes on to say:

I am the vine; you are the branches.

If you remain in me and I in you,

you will bear much fruit;

apart from me you can do nothing.  

As much as I love being connected to people, I know that fundamentally, I must be connected to God.
So I'd like to throw a little challenge out there for you. Who are you connected to and why?

Improvements

Have you ever had any building work done in your house? I can remember when we had a new kitchen put in our previous house. Gemma was tiny and the upheaval was horrendous. I had to build a makeshift kitchen in the lounge so I could sort Gemma's milk and meals out. We had to put stuff away in different parts of the house or just throw things away we didn't need anymore in preparation for the work to be done. Dust sheets were put down, doors were sealed up so the dust didn't spread throughout the rest of the house.  But for all the hard work and stress the result was fantastic. I can still remember the joy I felt when it was all done and the rest of the house was back to normal and the kitchen was such an improvement.

Life can be like that I find. Yesterday I started physio on my ankles. At the moment I can't wear any shoes with a back on them (like trainers or golf shoes.....very frustrating!!) as they put too much pressure on a growth I have on the back of my heals. This causes me enormous pain and means I end up walking like an old woman, which I know I'm approaching but would rather it wasn't quite so soon!!!
I know that this physio will probably make things worse initially but I'm hoping it will give me a long term solution and I'll be able to play golf and badminton once again in the not too distant future.

Last week we finished our first Morphing chapter. (If you don't know what I'm talking about I explain it in more depth in an earlier blog). There have been times on that journey which I've had to delve into emotions and feelings which have caused me great pain and upset. We've all spent time sharing and discussing how life has treated us, and looked back on our experiences sometimes with sadness. But I know I've come to the end of this first chapter feeling in a better place and having grown as a person and grown closer to God. I've learnt more about myself and I've had challenges which have made me face up to stuff and deal with things that have happened to me. It's been a bit like counselling I suppose, but with a trusted group of friends!!

As a parent, I sometimes have to challenge Gemma on her behaviour and her tidiness (!!) so she can learn and develop into an independent young lady. Someone who will be a leader not a follower, someone who will have confidence in herself and her beliefs. And ultimately someone who will be happy with who she is. These challenges can cause conflict between us and times of stress and strife at home, but I challenge her because I care about her. I care about what she becomes and how people perceive her. I love her and want the best for her.

As a Christian I believe God challenges us in life so we can grow and become who and what He made us to be. Sometimes we have to make decisions and challenge people which may rock the boat, or aren't received well and cause conflict and pain. But God has our best interests at heart. He wants us to learn and improvements to be made. He wants us to be reconciled with Him and, where we can, to live in peace with one another (Romans 12:18).

What I'm trying to say, is that sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. We have to have conflicts before we can have resolutions and growth and improvements, whether that's in a war zone, politically or relationally. So if you're in the middle of a conflict, or have been challenged about something or are going through a sad chapter of your life, then try to think about the improvements that are being made in you. Hold onto the future, and the hope and trust that God has us in the palm of His hand.